August finish

Tomorrow is a Holiday. Its something I hardly thought of and relatively unimportant. Its called Labor day the first Monday of the month of September. Its too bad its the first day. This simply means there is no work.


I have moved in some furniture and hooked up internet. I also got heat and electricity. It looks like a home except that its just me here.


Today I was with a friend for too long. We had a good time but he doesn't understand social situations very well. My friend isn't someone I want to hang out with much just because he is a bad influence. He would conflict with our values. I want to do everything I can in order to just have our family and ask for your hand nothing else matters to me except for finding a way to make us happy. Its really important to me and I will try harder not to get lonesome and sad about this.

you know my mind.


So after that I had dinner with some Japanese again at the Food Zoo. I really want to hang out with them more. I like learning about Asian values and trying to make things more possible than already are.

I am sitting in my apartment now its Sunday night and I am getting tired even though its only ten. September is almost here.

I can't wait.

Love you so much.

Quest Digging

So I have completed my first week back in school. I went to all of my classes and think I will have alot of work to do this semester. I am not looking forward to this prospect actually. I am still in the process of moving into my house and this weekend will be a good way to relax since its labor day on the first of September.

In America we have this day reserved for no work. Its a day to awknowledge work and so its a day to rest!

I will try to move more into my house and I can't wait for September I think it will be a wonderful month. I have lots of things to do this week its kind of scary. I should be able to get internet though soon!


I met a guy today. This guy is 57 years old and a very nice man. He has had some interesting stories and he gave me some books for my class. I owe him a lot he really has taken an iterest in my life. he wanted to hear all about my life in Korea because I shared a class with him. His books will save me at least 80 dollars^^

I am trying to learn a lot from him because he has a lot of valuable knowledge and so I would like to spend a few times this semester just having some nice conversations with him.

I am going to be really busy this week trying to get some work done. I don't enjoy cramming but thats the way its looking.


I am on a mission a Quest to dig for richer and better things. I will write more about these things but the biggest thing I want to mention right now is that Life is meant to be Joyful and Happy and everything I do and everywhere I go I want to see this happen. In my current state of affairs with my life and my situation I want to make situations better.


I got the richest treasure in the world and more than anything I want to make it work^^

I will expand on this more but I need to write a few emails and do some more research hope you slept well...Dreaming of you and September ^^

At night

It's cool here. Now the wind is blowing and some crikets are chirping. Their singing means that we have fall and soon we will cold day at night. When I was young, I heard the frogs' crying in mid-summer. I thought how most frogs could cry or sing songs all day and night. They seemed not to need sleep or rest. Now the crikets are same. They are singing with regular intervals.

Today I found a small mosquito at my father's garden which is so small, but has lots of mums, grapevine, peachy tree,several types of cactus, unnamed lots of flowers. This summer, I rarely had mosquitos' attack, but other bugs. As time goes by and the weather is getting cooler, they disappeared. Most of bugs like me too much, so I don't like bugs, insects and reptiles at all. Because some of them are so disgusting. Why I refer this mosquito is that it bit me when I washed clothes. I felt itchy and scratched, so my skin is bloated.

I cooked fried eggplant, steamed egg, noodles with black sause like ramyeon which we had chinese restaurant. My father loved my cooking and we ate a lot. If I tap my stomach, I can even hear the sound of drum. Haha.

My work was so so. Mr.J said to me polite about Saturday work. I knew it wasn't his real mind. It was just cheat. I was tired of hearing and seeing his show. When I met him, I only noded my head. Kids were bad except Chansuk, Ann and Jane. They are smart but I want they to show more passion about studying and learning foreign language.

Night is dark and darker. It makes people think and dream about something. I like silent night without any interruption. Tonight I am still dreaming of us and meeting you soon.

Beyond the words

Today I woke up so ealry and then I fell asleep again. I dreamt of you and wanted to stay with you a little bit more. I heard the vibration of my phone. It was you. I was so happy to hear your voice. It always makes me comfortable and happy. I think you know what I am saying. Although I call you, but I don't say anything to you, you will understand my mind. When I think of you, my heart beat is getting faster and my head starts to think about us. Sometimes we are like old couples who have lived for 40 years already.

I left home almost 11. Cause there were lots of thing to do. washing the dishes, clothes, cleaning your key holder and sewing something for you. It's still secret though. Missing my own thing made me nervous. After swimming, when I took a shower, my necklace was broken. So golden pendant dropped on the shower booth. I didn't notice that I lost it until I dried my hair. I thought it's an evil omen. I was worried about you. Thanks to god, I found them all and I won't wear it at all.

Anyway, as I told you yesterday, I made my own lunchbox. Today's menu was fried kimchi-tuna rice. That is one of my favorites and good food to make people healthy. Especially you. haha. I had fresh green apple too. Two days ago, I brought it at work and shared with Viki. And also we had cool ice black coffee and cookies. Don't you envy us? I finished writing students' report cards except 7 kids who don't want to follow my instruction and have their own opinions.

Before we left work place, Mr.J came to us and started to explain his lots of homework. I didn't want to hear his excuses at all. But there was no way to run away or avoid it. He is so stubborn and high and mighty. Finally, Even Molly came to me and started about her homework, although her homework was the least of all kids. That's only 9 times. I'm pretty sure if Mr.J keeps his own way without any adjustment, the academy will disappear soon.

At home, I had ramyeon and rice. It was good, but my condition was bad. I was so starving and my stomachache was almost empty. Because of spicy I felt hurt my stomach, soon I have to go to bathroom. Just for a moment, I should not eat spicy and hot food at all.

I thought of you a lot except work time. There's no room to think because of kids. They are little devils. It's true. They have masks to avoid their nature. The more I teach many classes, the more I could understand you a lot. How much you are treated by kids, How may times you should just tolerate that situations and How long you try to fix several problems.

I can't say words how much I understand and love you. We don't need to say to each other about our mind or thinking. I know your mind and think you will know my mind too. It's not acquired thing. We are better half to each other. That's why we know this very well. The God admits our relationship and bless us.

Fighting Loneliness

In 2 days I will be able to stop going to the library at night^^ I want to stay at home and be able to surf the internet freely without having to go see freshman at the school and wait for a computer.


I feel so horrible sitting in my apartment alone again. I keep thinking to myself that there is something I should be doing. It has unfortunately given me a headache. I am waiting for my friend to call me but he doesnt seem to care anymore. Since getting back I met him once and it was by chance.

I realize I am all alone really and the best thing to do is just to get homework done and look for a new job to save us money. I am fighting cause I don't ever want to stop and give up.

I know that this is going to be well and ultimately exciting someday. Right now I am trying to save money and not buy a lot of things. Its almost September. September is my month to actually enjoy. The weather is perfect here and I can focus on my studies without interuption. Its amazing how 3 years ago I was all about playing and wanting to not study all the time but now I am liking homework cause it keeps me busy.


I want to go to the gym too soon. I hope I can so I can get more muscles for you^^

I am so happy right now though because I couldn't ask for a better future wife and for the first time in my life I know what I want^^

i will start doing more hobbies and try to get a fresher outlook too. Its hard for me to adjust still because I have been gone for a long time.

I dream of making a better future with you as soon as possible. I also think that I don't care about here right now either. I am not undergrad student but I am not a grad student either. I am just here. I am looking for opportunities and thinking of you all the time. I am going to go home now so I can get your phone call soon

Write more soon!

I love your stories sweetie! It makes me happy to get up in the morning to find your emails/story for me^^ I love all you do for me and more than that I LOVE you.

Knitting my life

That's work, sewing and thinking. Although work at the academy is so bad, I can't help including it in my life. Everyday I do my work and am afftected by it, in spite of I don't want it at all. Today I taught 7 classes and my legs hurt so much. One of the bad things in the morning is to go to work. I don't want to work. I need rest more. But at the same time I need to earn money for our future. As I told you, I don't want to live poorly. And also I don't want you to work so much. I want to help you more, and be your helper.

Sewing is my life nowadays. If I don't have this hobby, how can I endure every moment and hour? When I'm sewing, I don't think about anything. I just focus on my work without interruption. It helps me not to think so much and look down. Whenever I make something for you, I just feel happy to show my work to you soon. I can imagine smiling your face looking at my works.

Thinking is my friend and enemy. You know why I say like this. I don't want to refer about this at all. I am still not good and I still feel empty because of your leaving.

Today Viki and I talked about level up students. There are no kids who can level up except two or three kids. D classes students are dropping and we have to make kids level up to fill out the empty. If we lose the kids (especially D classes), we can't keep the academy well. It will be collapsed soon.

Mr. Jeong yelled at us yesterday because of homework. He thought that we have to give more homework to kids. As you know the situation, the more he gives lots of homework to kids, the more they complains about that in my and Viki's classes. He is making the situation worse. Finally, Alexa told her mom about this, she may quit soon. She is not my favorite, but I don't want to lose my kids like this.

I think I talked about work so much. Sorry. Nowadays I'm surrounded by work, work, and work. I am still translating my brother's work at home, and It will finish it before this sunday. I don't know this work makes me study more or not. But I'm pretty sure I can read the paragraphes faster than before.

And also I am still studying the vocabularies and listening, too. It's still hard for me though. I want to see your school more, ride your bike, go to Food for Thoughts, meet your old friends, greet to your parents and enjoy my future with you.

UM DAYS

SO I am two days completed at the University. I finished all of my classes. Now I will have to just do the homework which is unfortunately massive. I don't like this.


Life at UM is a lot different than it was before I left. My friends are gone or have changed a lot. I don't recognize anything and want to be left alone more and more.


I am already popular with the new foreign students. haha

I am basically hanging out with my Korean friend and touring the places I used to go. I ride my bike by my apartments I used to live every day. I see my old friends places but they are no longer there.


I have been to the Food For Thought a few times ~ Its still nice. I think once the semester gets underway it will be more fun.

UM is a wonderful place Honey~ I think its too small though. Traffic is easy to handle. I hope you can enjoy this.

I had a bad dream last night and feel like I am losing my mind sometimes. I am just thinking a lot about us and hopefully no matter what make it happen...I know in my heart you're the one and only for me.

I will write more but I need to do some homework tonight at least I feel like I should

HOMECOMING ANGUISH

Honey~ I came back to Missoula. This is my home. I saw my family and survived the reunion, I saw a couple friends back in Kalispell and was happy to see some of them.


Now I am in Missoula. I stick out so much and its scary. I dress more like a man from Asia than an American. I desire Korean things and also to be alone. I feel strange doing the things that I used to do.

I ride my bike and my mother ruined it so it actually is uncomfortable to ride. I just finished my first and only class today. Tomorrow I will have two more. I hope they aren't difficult. I still don't have internet at my home so I will have to wait until I get it so I will not be able to talk to you yet. I may go to my Kroean friends house though so if I do I will call you on Skype.

Honey I am the old man on campus there aren't many people I know left. Since getting here. I got my heat and electricity set up, moved into my house, spent a night in the dark and no shower because the water system didn't work yet and I still have a lot of personal things to do. I wish I had furniture. This week is going to be hard for me.


I read your story and I keep thinking of me back in Korea and wishing I was still there. I had hoped so much to have left knowing more and leaving you in a better place I am truly sorry for that.


Life here is difficult for me because my family/friends don't understand how serious I am about you. I met you, liked you, loved you and want to spend the rest of my life with you. I thought about this for at least 6 months honey. My friends think its a joke and it hurt me.

I honestly can't say how much I love you but I do know that I dream of an ideal situation for us. I hope that you will not worry so much about everything. Sweetheart I dont know what to do here other than try to do well in my classes. I am keeping busy and finding things for us^^

I found a dvd set of Law and Order SVU so I can watch a lot of Elliot if I had tv.

I want to buy some nice clothes for you and I soon. I hope I get friends who will want to come to my house I guess I have been gone too long. If you call me I don't care when you do its 4 in the morning or 4 in the afternoon ok.


When I think of work in Yale honey I think of the 3 of us making the most of it in a weird situation. If I could have my ultimate wish it would be to live with you here in America (maybe missoula but it doesn't have to be) and I would even go to Korea again.

I just want to be in your life. You know this right?

I will not stop working and take much breaks. I want you more than anything.


So as I walk the campus I feel a little awkward because I don't know anyone here. School is more difficult than I would like it to be. I am working though and I will continue to work hard.


You will be so happy with me^^


Honey~ I also think ice coffee is good I will try it. I went to the store but I only bought a little food. I will buy more soon once I can get my routine going. Life is too fast again for me.

Talk to you soon!

Nothing special

Here everything is same. Noisy kids, Barked Mr. Jeong, Weird Miss. Jeong and bad work condition will never change at all. Nowadays I stoped making everything all right or caring about work. Like you did before, I just look at everthing and ignore it.

Today I went to downtown with mom. She bought two T-shirts, two mid-long pants and sandal for her trip. I ate ddeokboki by myself. It was still delicious, but not good than the time we had it together. I want to cook chop steak, ddeokboki, bulgogi, curry rice, galbi, and everything we had before.

I had dongas after I finished two classes. I wasn't very hungry so I shared it with several kids including Namju and Yejin. I called MA1 kids so I almost finished telephone teaching in this class. When I taught kids, most of kids yawned, almost slept because of hot. Miss Jeong didn't turn on the air conditioner strongly, so kids started to complain about it. I yelled at kids to stop complaining and focus on my teaching. They didn't care about that though.

Before I went to work, I bought a pack of ice black coffee tea bag. If you were here, you would like this a lot. And I would be happy to see your smile. When I send my package to you, I will send this, too. I din't fix my mind what I have to buy for you. Because there are lots of different types of T-shirts, sweaters and cardigans. As you know me, I like shopping a lot at offline stores and also online stores.

My days are same all the time. This job teaching dumb and naughty kids isn't easy and I am getting tired of this. I really hope they show their passion about learning foreign language and studying more to me. I've been proud of myself and I don't want the kids to ruin it.

Honey, I need your advice and love. I need your hug and kiss, too. I really miss you and want to talk about my work, your school life and everything. It's unhappy that there's no one to talk about problems. Nothing special makes me tired and exhausted.

Missoula part 1

Today I made my new start. I got to my new place where I will have to wait for electricity and cooking etc for a few days. School starts tomorrow and I am just hoping that I will have plenty of freetime. I am going to keep busy.


I am surprised nowadays at the changes. Everything is in English, people are talking English, even though Missoula is big and the traffic is horrible in certain places its so much easier than Gumi. I feel lost because I have few friends here and moving in my new place alone yet again is interesting. I am hoping this week will be fun but now I feel more scared abuot starting over.



I am back in Missoula. I was under the picture in the textbook back on the shelf in my Academy that I showed everyone. If they took a picture with me in it. I could tell everyone I was there.


I am really hoping to learn more Korean and get my life back on track. I am dedicated and trying to push myself to exceed my expectations. I got a lot of ghosts in my closet that need to be excused. I want to live well and get things unravelled.


Everything reminds me of you. I see people who think they have something great but nothing compares to what we have. I think of what you would be doing if you were here. I know that the situation is hectic right now. I am here and you are there but I believe in us so strongly and I know we can find a way. We just have to try even harder.

The road ahead is bumpy but I know how we can ride it out.


Its so hot right now. The weather is the 90s. I want to go swim soon, I want to start and finish a project for school but I have to wait. I am riding a bike around town. I think its broken because my mother didn't take care of it, so I will have to fix.


I like my apartment. Its big but small too. I hope living here is going to get easier its so weird for me here now. I hope you can come soon, just believe you can. We can make it work. I hope Academy life is ok...I don't want you to worry to much.


I will write more but I am really tired and think I should go home for a while to rest. You may be getting up right now to check email soon too!

Life is sure interesting and busy we got to make the most of it. YOu always filled my void and there is nothing that can replace. talk soon.

Heu No Ni

Heu No Ni is original Korean word, not derivated from Chinese or Japanese. It means "Missing someone so much and yearning or worshiping" As you already know this we always yearn each other so much. Whenever I go to bed or get up, I dream of talking to you. Your voice makes me happy and not to worry about you.

I know you have hard time there nowadays. It makes me sad and think of your health a lot. Everything which you had, heard, saw, ate and told is very important issue for me. We affect each other so much. Because I love you so much and also you love me so much, too. I know we will do this continuously until we meet together again.

Certainly September is like a new start. You will get a good job, meet good friend, enjoy your life there. Both you and I will have busy everyday. In my case, there's no extra teacher in our academy, so Viki and I have to work more. Last week, I had 32 classes including six more classes. And I finished telephone teaching for over 50 kids. I was proud of myself a lot.

Everyday I do my best and want to have busy life. Even a little free time gives me recalling. Sometimes it made me drop my tear and sometimes smile. Today I went to my grandma's grave. It's located in the countryside and it took for an hour for me to go there. My family didn't care about cleaning there. So there were lots of weed around the tomb. I worked a lot with my parents, sister, and relatives. We pulled out weed and cut big trees which can make large shadow on the grave so the grass can't grow.

At that time, I thought that we cleaned your house for a week. I forced you clean, pack, sweep, rub, and wash. This memory always makes me sad and finally drop tear. I shoud've enjoyed being with you more at that time. After you left me, I yearn you a lot. I noticed how much I relied on you and you cared of me. Being with you was the best medicine for me. Today I heu no ni you and I will heu no ni you more and more.

Laying Foundations

Laying Foundations planting seeds, here I am trying to reap massive benefits.


Its the only comfort I am getting in being away from Korea is that I am trying to build a strong base to what will be a wonderful house.


I have a dream and I am wanting it to come true whatever the cost may be.



Today I went to Kalispell. I had a breakfast with my grandma, I visited with my Uncle and a cousin of mine, and saw my dad. I am packing for what will be the longest period of my life Bachelor dome.


I am excited about going back to a house alone and having nothing but time to think about what I need to do without the interuptions from my family. I know this sounds callous but I don't want to be judged anymore. I will make something right. I got in touch with a long lost friend today. I miss my cross country team from high school and was happy to see them.


I am still packing my bags for my new house and a new start back in what is called Zoo town or the garden city, Paradise, Heaven or simply put known as Missoula.


Once I get there things will be better and I can start packing and planning for my future.



I am going to go finish up some boxes now. My stories aren't the same as hey once where but right now I am living in a whirlwind where I am just trying to sort things out.

Memory Flashes

I have been home for almost a week. Its Saturday and it means I haven't worked for a week.

I am cleaning my room, I am getting rid of things I don't need at all anymore and trying to make a new transition in my life...back at my college town.


My mind is racing with thoughts of Christina. I keep playing in my mind all the things we did and all the fun we had. I think too much and its because I am a serious person. I am going back to Missoula in order to take a break and suck in a deep breathe in order to see the future that awaits me.

I am scared because for the first time I can't do it alone. My right arm is missing. My work at Yale is complete. I know its the best. The job was a mess for me and its only reward is that I finished it so now I may have a good chance at getting better job. The other reward is that it gave me the love of my life.


I stand here in my home just imagining possibilities and dreaming of better opportunities.

Im looking forward to next week and the coming September. September always seems nicer. The weather is cooler, the coming of fall is like a new start.

I miss my Shuske so much I hope I can do this alone because I don't feel good finding my own way now.

There were two people on the street

I just walk down the street which you are not anymore without thinking. If I wander here and there, I can meet our memories everywhere. I think you are the only person who gives me enery I can live today. Your face, smile and voice are melt on the street.

The streets which we walked up and down everyday are waving me and the memory on the street is grabbing my ankle. I stand there and think of you for awhile. Until I close my room, it follows me.

If I look back because of my thinking I hear your voice, there's no one there, only lots of your appearances are filling with the street. Whenever I pass the Mcdonald, Lotteria and other places, I am thinking of you and remind our memories.

It's still rainy and the streets were wet and slippy. When I walk on the street, I remembered how we cared about each other everyday and how many times we walked there.
Sometimes we went for a walk east side and sometimes west side. I can't count and remember how much we walked before.

Along the road, we went to the nice restaurants, fastfood stores, fancy stores and convinient stores. They have all our memories and when I pass them, just they show me about your memories like old pictures.

It tells me that there were Two people, Nick and Christina, who were talking, laughing and eating in Gumi. They loved each other so much and they still fall in love. Their love is so pure and real thing. It won't be stop forever.

Home Searching

Honey tomorrow I will go look at an apartment. Its going to be my new home. I am excited and scared too. I will be living with a friend I am hoping it will be fun. I will study hard and lk for jobs.

Sweetie~I have done a little thinking about things. I remember you were a little shy to go to my apartment. I still am angry that Miss Jeong and Mr. Jeong made us feel so uncomfortable. I truly think that they are the worst type of people on Earth. I didnt want you to ever feel scared about coming to my house. Honey I hope soon you will be free from that job.


I am praying so much that things will get better. The next home I find I want it for us. I will save a lot of money living with a friend and it should only be for awhile.


I have thought about my leaving a lot to. I still feel horrible about saying goodbye to you. I never wanted to hurt you and for as long as I am here I will never forgive myself. Sweetie I can't tell you how much I love you. I have been tempted to quit now and go back already. I worry that I have done you wrong.

I really want to make you happy and do what we need to do. I mean this from the bottom of my heart. I want you to live with me in my next house.

TO make you laugh I hope
1. We have 125 days until Christmas
2. We have less than 700 days until we marry^^


I will make any plan sweetie. I want to go to Korea for my next home
Work another year in a college hopefully, and take you home with me. 1st Christmas in Korea 2nd one with me in America.
I would also want you to just come here and be with me. Marry me now. I would do anything for you


I hope you know this and I don't want you to go to bed feeling badly. I want to give you the world, the sun moon and stars and then some. I would do it. I really want you more than anything I have ever wanted.

Honey my birthday present... Anything you like^^ Shirts, tea, tea cup, you and a bikini, pictures of you, sweater,

I want something for our house OUR HOME...
I will move away from Missoula for you...Seattle, California, New York, Pennsylvania Wisconsin, The moon, Europe, etc.

please lets talk soon! Love you lots forever, today and always,

Since I have been gone

Honey

My life is awful without you. I can't sleep well because I think of you. I haven't talked to my friends because they are too busy for me.

I have tried to help my family but I have made my dad feel sad, my mom cry and my grandma cry. MY grandmother got divorced twice, had a rough life, and now has had her favorite grandson make her cry. I am so rotten.

I wanted to be alone so I could focus on me but people here make me sad. I don't belong here. I shouldn't have ran away.

Honey I will go to school soon, I will let things go away. I have tried to think happy and realize I am the one who put myself in this position. Honey for as long as I live I will regret running away. I can't cry because if I do it will only make it worse.


Sweetie I am yours, I am going to marry you, and you are my better half, you are everything to me. The things we shared and did are far too important for me to stay here. I have to go to school because I paid for them. I wrote Mr. Jeong about teaching in Suwon college. Honey I want to come back for you. I don't want you to be sad and feel horrible.


Is there anything I can do?
I am sorry I couldn't talk more, honey call me whenever you can ok. I bought a calling card it doesn't work I am so angry. Honey~ I will study and come back for you please study too ok. WE can find something together. Don't cry or be upset I don't want this.

I know its hard and I know that our situations are good but we can Fight.

Home is not what I remembered it and I want to leave Asap. Honey I want you to love America and I want you to love my family but making my family cry isn't what I thought would be good homecoming. I guess I am too changed. Ugly transformation


I see you and you are my HOPE. I will never Quit or give up on you. Don't worry tell me what you think. I read your stories and I love them but I don't want you to feel bad. I will give you anything ok

Scent of love carried by The wind

Today I got up shivering because of chilly draft. It's almost fall, no already fall.
I can see the trembling leaves and colored leaves here and there. Before I went to swimming pool, I wore my yellow cardigan. And I just sat my room and started to think about you. The clothes were warm and cozy. Whenever I felt cold and was shivering, you grabed my arm and rubbed my back and hands. It's our happy memory, but nowadays it just makes me sad.

I smelled my perfume which you liked the best and felt like to calling you instantly. I tried to call you twice in the morning. You didn't answer. My feeling was going down rapidly. I wanted to talk to you lots of things. It's not important thing though. I know how much you are busy and you have many things to do because of school. I can understand but still a little sad. Sorry. I can't control my emotion.
After you aren't here, I am getting smaller and smaller, and also be quiet.

When I talked to you at work, I smelled scent of love from abroad through the wind. How much you love me, and care of me all the time. As I told you, you are my sunshine, my hope, my future husband and my world. I can't find anyone better than you in the world. Your smell is fresh, sweet, sour and sometimes bitter.
When you tell me about love, it's sweet. When you tell me about your family, it's bitter. When you tell me about your friends, it's sour. And finally when you tell me about our love, it's fresh.

I remember all your scent of love and it floats in my head all day long. Usually your sweet love wakes me up and gives me energy which I can work all day long in spite of 7 classes. I hope our love will be strong everyday, every month and every year.

Recollection about rain drops

It's raining now. The rain drops makes me think of you.
I don't like drizzly rain, but shower is good especially in summer.
When we went to Kyoung Ju last summer, we caught the shower in Bulguk temple.
We were talking at the bus stop waiting for bus, the rain started to pour hardly.
I like to hear rain drops. If i listen to the sound of rain drops, I feel like to wash all bad things off my mind. I think rain made us closer and fall in love with each other. ^^

anyway, today I had 7 classes. MA2 was so so. there was no special thing. MB3 had test day. While they were testing, I wrote a short note for you. MB1, MC3, MC1 were boring. MD3 had test like MB3. And MD1 was horrible. They started to complain about Mr. J's class and lots of homework. I didn't prepare my teaching well, so I had to spend time to fix the cassette tape.

After work, Mr.Jeong treated us sandwiches and milk. Why he treated it after work, not during our breaks? If I tell my parents about this, they just response it's bait to work hard. Viki and I even didn't say thank you about his treat. I was talking with my mom and Viki was talking her husband. How nice timing...

I didn't feel tired at all. When I was bored and tired, I just thought about you. And as you told me, I didn't care about classes at all. I kicked out all kids in teacher's room. I should've done this before you left here.

The rain pours now. It seems that someone is singing outside. I remember standing in your livingroom and seeing rain drops in one day of August. The rain clouds covered the sky and it poured a lot. We sat cozy sofa and enjoyed snuggling. I miss at that time a lot. If I have time machine, I want to go back with you again.

Second day without you

It was sunny. The wind was breezing slightly. Everything looked like the same except you. There's no your smile, joke teasing me, lunch feast, coffee break, mobile messages and play. I miss everything we shared before.

When you called me last time, I was thinking of you reading your notes. I heard vibration of my phone and I pick it up. I thought you would leave at 10, so I didn't think you would call me at 9:41. I recalled that number, but you didn't answer like yesterday. I was crying a lot because of regret. I should have answered....

I went to swimming pool to refresh my mind. I swam so hard and lost one kilo again.
Now I am 57kg. Last night I didn't sleep well. I only slept for 6 hours and had 5 classes instead of Mr.Jeong. I have to work this Saturday, too. He has an appointment on this day, Viki and I will teach dumb kids.

When i had break time, Chansuk came to me and told me "Nick teacher wanted to say this to you. He liked you so much and wanted to marry you someday." I was happy to hear your saying from him and I could work hard.

From tomorrow Test day starts. It's lucky for us. Although we have seven classes, if you make kids take tests, we can sit and just take rest more. I don't worry this week. The problem is next week. ㅠ0ㅠ I don't know what to do.

I just want to leave here and follow you soon. I miss you a lot. And I hope I can dream of you tonight. Tonight I made two owls for you,soon I'll send them to you.
Maybe every month. I'm not sure how many I can make them every night. If I'm tired, I won't make them.

Honey, I love you so much. I can't say my love in words like you. It's not enough I say love you every day, every moment and forever. Hopefully talk to you soon.

Memoir of us

It's August 18th in Korean. My better half, Nicholas Kelly Palmer, left me at 3 p.m. after eathing lunch with me, Viki and weird Miss. Jeong. I didn't say good bye to you because of my class, when you left me.
We had cleaned a lot for a week and tried to have good time together here and there.
I will remind Pappa rottie, Mcdonald, Library, Seraf, Downtown and everywhere we went to before.And Whenever I pass or go there, I will think of you and dream of you.
I know it will make me look down and feel loney.
If I am sick, I will remember you buying medicine for me.
If I go to bus stop, I will remember the place where we sat and talk to each other.
If I read English book, I will remember the library and bookstore.
If I see the train, I will remember our Busan, Seoul and Daegu trip.
Whenever I wear clothes and earings which you bought for me, I will miss you a lot.
You will feel the same way like me. I know your mind well than yourself.
I don't want you to look down or mope, cry, be gloomy. Although we can't meet each other, let's have good time and prepare our future. We hope we can marry soon, have family soon and baby soon.
As you told me, You are in vacation now and It will take at least 4 months.
I can endure these hardship for you.
Let's be stronger and not be affected by situation.
LOVE YOU SO MUCH FOREVER!!

Something in the air

There is something in the air and that something is called Love. I left Korea today and felt very horrible about the whole ordeal. I left behind my better half to face the work problems alone. Am I awful person?


I will go home and spend a few months only reorganizing my life and working closer in order to get things done.

I am sad that I can't have my better half with me for awhile. She did so much for me. I am lucky to have a girl like her.

We have hope, prayer and God on our side. I spent my last day with Min young and I hope we can all meet again soon. I think that if I go back to Korea things will be better.


At anyrate now I am home and I just finished talking to Christina. WEhave good things going and in the air tells me I will have good time soon.
I will write more later I am tired now. Talk soon